Nourishment

Don't be scared of my bony arms!
You look so worried about
The pale whiteness of my dry dark eyes bulging out of
The sunken sockets on
My fleshless tobacco-chewing face,

                  She says, laughing hard.
                  Coiling her thickest darkest knee-length hair
                  Into her a loose bun,
                  Stirring the sauce,
                  Turning over the paraantha,
                                    on the tava,
                  Rolling the next ball of dough
                                    on the chakla,
                  She holds my gaze with hers
                  Demands my
                  Undivided attention, enunciates
                  Softly -
                  Unambiguously - 

These wiry fingers can
hold your face
Without cracking, when you feel
                  Fatherless,
                  Motherless,
                  Loverless,
                  Childless
They will feed you
Nourishing hot meals that calm your
Anxious soul
So that you may continue your fights about
My plight

Eat!
Don't feel guilty that I feed you
With my belly stuck to my spine.
I will feed your
Mother, too
If she will let me.
If she will
Remember
Me as Budhiya
In a sari, in a bindi
A dying body that lived fully
Gracefully
Not in this everyday attire
That I wear for the world
To prove the
Fidelities that are demanded of me
Acting
Living
Laboring
Without compromising
Hansa, the Soul
Processing
                  my Desires
Un-possessing
                  my Attachments
Dis-possessing
                  my Dreams
Re-possessing
                  my Spirit
On my own terms
                  Kicking categories
Claiming religion
                  Namelessly
                                    Freely
                                                      Abundantly
                                    Closing my eyes
                  Losing myself
                                    Singing Hansa
                                    The Soul
                                                      Again,
                                                      Yet again.

20 November 2016